This is mirrored in nature as spring progresses. In Calgary in particular, nature moves slowly in the spring, but once the plants have decided it is time, you can observe incredible changes every day!

How about you? Is there an aspect in you that is ready to burst forward?
Some physical activity or creative outlet? Perhaps something at work has been smoldering along and needs a fresh perspective and some enthusiasm to let it take off?

Where are you holding back, because you think you can’t or shouldn’t or are unsure of how to do it?

While nature just moves forward without hesitation and gives it its all, you and I have our complex emotions and mind sets to contend with every time we take a conscious step forward. When you decide on a new direction or a new activity, you are stepping out of your comfort zone and out of what you think you know. You are stretching the envelope of your beingness.

This takes courage!

Have you ever acknowledged yourself for the courage you have? Every day?

Where do you get your courage from?

Is it your mind or your heart that steps forward?

The word courage appeared in the English language in the 13th century and was spelled “corageous”. It contains the latin word for heart: cor which refers to the pumping, physical heart. To me, it makes sense that the word courage connects to the heart. Don’t you feel your heart starting to pump harder and more noticeably when you are in a situation that asks something new or challenging of you?

At the same time your blood is pumping harder, your mind will be sending off warning messages, offering you excuses to not move forward. Sometimes you will listen to those messages, other times you will ignore them. What makes the difference?

If the activity that requires courage is really important to you, to your expression of your authentic being, you will be able to move more easily beyond the mind. Authenticity or soul-based living moves through the heart. When your intentions are in alignment with your purpose, more courage becomes available.

Courage also connects to trust: trusting to let go of what you know, of what you have experienced in the past, of what you are afraid of may happen in the future.

Courage is in the moment.

You cannot plan for it.

So, when you notice courage in yourself or another, acknowledge and celebrate it!

Go, courage, go!!!

We will start Sunday, March 18th and meet at my home according to the schedule below. While there is a benefit and momentum created in attending all sessions, you can also feel free to attend selected ones. They all have a theme, so choose what speaks to you!
Cost will be by donation.

Conscious Heart:
A 12 – Step Journey of Expansion and Empowerment to Create New Perspectives and Alignments on Your Path to Living Fully From Your Truth.

March 18th 10am – 12pm Spaciousness and Renewal

April 1st 10am – 12pm Support and Community

April 15th 10am – 12pm Acceptance and Truth

April 22nd 10am – 12pm Trust and Compassion

May 12th (Saturday) 10am – 12 pm Kindness and Wisdom

May 27th 10am – 12pm Gratitude and Surrender

June 10 10am – 12 pm Your Journey

I am looking forward to share this time with you! Please let me know when you want to attend. : )

At some point, I noticed myself getting “tight”, wanting to create an outcome that I thought was “right” (Ah, that even rhymes!). My focus narrowed, choices were limited, and I started to feel uncomfortable in my body.

Finally, I realized what I was doing: trying to control a situation with my will!

Deep breath in!

I remembered other times when that behavior had backfired.

So, what to do?

Time to pull out my secret weapon: surrender.

Surrender is an interesting concept for me.

I always used to confuse it with doing nothing, hanging back, and feeling at the mercy of life around me and sometimes even the feeling of giving up. However, a few years ago one of my teachers gave me a yogic surrender practice, and I followed it for a month. It was an amazing teaching and changed my perception of what surrender means.

Through that exercise I was taught that surrender is an active process. It means getting out of my head into my heart and my body. Quieting myself down until I can feel and sense what is arising from my heart and/ or my body and act on that.

The mind always gets in the way. It is so quick and constantly overlays or even smothers the heart and body with its opinions. It takes continuous practice to get out from under it and reconnect with the true flow of life.

Being in the flow of life means not holding on to a particular idea and seeing it as the only way. As we mature and grow, our opinions about ourselves and life change and that is part of the natural evolutionary process of life. I certainly have preferences in my life, but am conscious that I do not want to be attached to them. And, when I am attached, it will show up in form of a challenge, just to let me know!

When I want something, instead of trying to control it from my will, I can move into a more expanded state of being. I can bring the situation forward with clarity and even place an intention around it. From there, I can move it into my heart and ask for guidance in how to move forward, knowing that I do not have all the answers and certainly do not know the “big picture” yet. Being quiet and waiting until something arises and receiving it without judgment. Acting on it. Waiting for the next insight. Acting on it.

Feeling the peace inside that my heart offers when it has been heard.

Aaahhh…

And, by the way, my daughter found her perfect place!

In Feng Shui I work with the Bagua, which functions as an energetic compass. It recognizes 8 distinct areas of life and one of these areas is called “Li” or “Fame and Reputation”. What always fascinated me about this particular aspect is that it looks at fame by asking two questions:

1. How do you see yourself?

And

2. How are you seen by others?

You can see that in this framework ‘fame’ has nothing to do with being ‘famous’ or being known by many for something that you offered into the world. It is just about you.

If, for both questions, you receive the same answers, it means you are congruent with yourself. Your inner state of being is in alignment with what you are expressing and people will pick that up and find it easy to connect with you.

If you have obtained diverse answers, it may well be because you have not allowed yourself to go deeper and check inside yourself if what you believe about yourself is actually your truth. Are you undervaluing or overvaluing yourself? Are you locked in by belief patterns or societal expectations and conventions? Either way, it is important to keep in mind that we all have incredibly fine-tuned sensors and can spot pretty easily when someone is not in alignment, talking one way and acting in another.

Another aspect of these questions relates to visibility: are you actually showing yourself to others or are you “under the radar” a lot of the times?

People who “over-give” are often in that category. They are so focused on others that they disappear in the process. You can also become invisible by getting so enmeshed with someone else’s life that you cannot discern anymore where one person starts and the other ends. Another way of disappearing occurs when you are letting your life be defined by the level of success someone close to you exhibits, i.e. when they are “up”, you are ”up”; when they are “down”, you are “down”. There are many subtle ways of not showing up in your life!

You can see that establishing and maintaining personal boundaries are an important facet in the establishment of your “ Fame and Reputation”. Boundaries allow you to create an energetic space around you. In this protected center you can rest in the truth of who you are, and at the same time you are visible and distinct from others. You can send out a clear message of who you are and be received clearly by others around you.

So, ask yourself: Are willing to see your true self? Are you allowing yourself to be seen in the world for who you are? Are healthy boundaries in place?

Yes? Yes? And Yes? Awesome!

An interesting aside is that when you are engaging the world from the inside out in alignment with your authentic being, you will always act in a morally responsible way. No laws, rules and commandments needed.

I like the simplicity of that!

I found the quote by Czeslaw Milosz and it seemed a perfect inspiration for a February blog.

“Love means to learn to look at yourself
The way one looks at distant things
For you are only one thing among many.
And whoever sees that way, heals his heart
Without knowing it, from various ills…”

So often in love, it is easy to lose perspective. You may think about giving love to someone and checking quietly how much you are receiving back. There may be inequality and then you suffer.

The amount of love you can offer to yourself is really the foundation for the depth of love you can give to the “outside”. Have you created a reservoir in yourself that you can draw from and that you are constantly refilling? Or are you regularly feeling depleted by being critical and judgmental about yourself?

Sometimes it is easy to go into a downward spiral and become more and more focused on what is not working, what you cannot do, what is missing.

I invite you to become aware when you are in this space of criticism and then make a decision to actively turn this around. Even visualizing a downward spiral coming to a stop and turning around into an upward rising spiral will begin to change the energy you bring into your life.

Step back from yourself and look at yourself through someone else’s eyes. Make a list of all your gifts and talents, noting those things in particular that are easy for you and therefore often overlooked as a talent or gift. What are your strengths? What do others come to you for?

You do not have to be perfect in order to offer value in life. Perfection is like a mask that does not evoke emotion. It is lifeless and creates distance. You only become engaged by something when it is active and in process, no matter if you feel that it is opening or closing your heart.

When you watch yourself too vigorously and hold on too tightly to judgments about yourself, you move yourself out of the flow. Life becomes serious, the problems grow out of proportion. Your existence becomes more about being in a reactive mode rather than making conscious decisions that are in alignment with your truth.

Allowing some distance, observing yourself through the eyes of another, supports you in creating some spaciousness around you. In that bubble or balloon of spaciousness you can move, shift perspectives and try something new.

In that space, you also create the foundation to experiencing compassion for yourself and this, in turn, will “heal (your) heart without knowing it, from various ills”.

Happy Loving! Happy Healing!

So much moves through your consciousness – thoughts, feelings, images, sounds, tastes, smells. You cannot be aware of all of it at the same time – it is overloading your system. So what tends to happen is that you automatically let things flow through until there is something that stands out – in either a positive way or a negative way.

A positive experience may be acknowledged with a “thank you”, feelings of happiness and gratitude. A negative experience is usually the result of having been reminded of a limiting belief, a fear, a habitual pattern – all of which were formed long ago and are often displaying a stubborn persistence – until you shine the light on them and look at them with fresh eyes.

What happens to you when something good happens in your life? Do you notice it, acknowledge it, celebrate it? Or are you reluctant to share or even feel embarrassed. Do you tend to downplay your successes in front of others, particularly when they are not having a good time themselves?

How about when a challenge arises in your life? Do you pay attention and deal with it at the time? Do you ignore it, hoping it will go away somehow if you do not spend any time with it? Do you over-share with others to gain sympathy?

In life, everything is waiting to be recognized and acknowledged by you. Until you recognize a positive or negative event, it is not real. If you stay unconscious to what is happening in your life, you will get more of the same experiences.

Your experiences are an indicator of your patterns, habits and beliefs and unless you pay conscious attention to what is showing up, you cannot create a change.

A way to release yourself from the confines of your patterns is to start recognizing what is going on:

“Ahh, I feel angry…”, “Ahh, I feel powerless…, “Ahh, I want this..”

Once you have the recognition, thank yourself and the Universe/ Spirit/ God for the insight: “Thank you!”

Next step is acknowledgment. Often this is easier looking at a positive experience, however, not always. With a challenge, instead of closing yourself down in regards to it, open yourself up and embrace it by saying: ”I love you!” Sending out this positive energy of acceptance will support you in neutralizing the negative energy. All of a sudden the pattern or behavior is no longer in a fixed position, but has room to move. Once it can move, perceptions shift and miracles can happen!

The more often you can consciously say: “Thank you! I love you!” to the events and occurrences in your life, the more freedom you will start to feel inside. So this can become a self-motivating practice.

Say it out loud in the car or silently to people you encounter during the day and notice what happens

And while you are at it, you might as well give yourself a pat on the shoulder and recognize and acknowledge yourself with a : “Thank you! I love you!!”

So, how do you experience these relationships? How do you adapt to the changes and challenges that come your way constantly?

Are you “leaning in”, are you” leaning out” or are you right in the center?

What do I mean by “leaning out”?

The feeling of “leaning out” is akin with separation or lack of engagement. You are not available to be fully present to a particular person or activity. You may notice that in conversations when you really do not want to engage with the person or topic. You may pretend to keep things smooth, but in your heart you do not feel connected in that moment. You may notice it at work when you find yourself not following through with a task and only managing to do the minimal amount keep things moving.

“Leaning out” is an expression of discernment. It offers a recognition of how you are relating to life in this moment. ”Leaning out” may be based on fear and a lack of control about how to manage a particular life situation. Not getting involved may keep the illusion alive of maintaining the status quo. At the same time, “leaning out” can also come from a place of self-love, understanding and honoring what nourishes and supports you. If I know that eating a bag of chips in one setting makes me feel unwell, then leaning away is perfect for me in that moment.

How about “leaning in”?

“Leaning in” usually means you are feeling more engaged. You are participating and offering your attention to people or activities. It can be an attractive place to hang out in, because it enhances your feelings of aliveness.

However, “leaning in” also offers some drawbacks. When you are leaning in, your focus can become narrowed and often, the will takes over. You may become more opinionated and offer your perspectives more strongly into the conversations or work activities in an attempt to subconsciously control life in that moment.

Sometimes you can get stuck in “leaning out” or “leaning in”.

Allow yourself to notice when you are – without judgment.

Offer yourself the opportunity to change your perception, to release your fears, to trust the guidance of your heart. Allow movement to occur freely : Starting from the center lean back and forward and back. Notice, when you do that, you will be hanging out in the center twice as often as compared to forward and back! Amazing!

In the center is where you find your heart, your peace and your joy!

As you move forward in your life, may you experience all of them more often and for ever increasing amounts!

The scale of the ancient sites in Egypt is just so grand and the workmanship so precise that in the face of it, common scientific explanations just fade away and something more profound comes forward.

We as people have created theories and histories around all of the Egyptian sites to explain and understand them. However, I realized that once I experienced them in person and connected with them at a conscious level, I could not contain them in anything that felt that limiting.

I do not know how and when these temples and pyramids were built. I do not know precisely what they were built for. Looking into the eyes of the Sphinx, I realized that there is something so ancient and timeless present, that I cannot grasp it with my mind.

In that moment, my rational mind could not offer words of explanation or theories. There was no point asking someone else for information, because at that time it was a gift offered to me that went beyond conventional understanding and theory. Childlike feelings of awe and wonder arose. My heart opened and new perspectives floated trough my awareness, not fully formed, but feeling expansive.

I had a profound experience of the beauty and heart-opening nature of mystery. This meant letting go of the need to understand with my mind and trusting my heart to connect.

Having opened myself more consciously to this energy of mystery, it becomes easier to connect with the mysteries that are around me all the time! I just need to stop and notice!
Can I look at a person, a flower or a beautiful rock with the same feeling of wonder and awe as I did in Egypt?

Can I let go of my knowledge, my preconceived ideas and just revel in the mystery of all?

Give it a go! I will!

Living in duality, even freedom gets sorted into a slot, depending which preposition you use!

How do you use the word freedom in your life? What is your main orientation?

Is your reality based mostly on “freedom from”? Do you focus on wanting to be free from pain, debt or a challenging relationship? Are you feeling the weight of all the issues that have accumulated over your life so far? How about freedom from the thoughts that are endlessly looping back and forth in your mind and seem inescapable, no matter what you try?

When you contemplate the words ”freedom from”, what sensations are you aware of in your body? Are you noticing a restriction, a sense of shrinking, of closing or being weighted down? Are you becoming aware of all the different ways you are not free?

“Freedom from” is passive: there is not much energy available to create the changes that you are hoping for. It keeps you in the comfort of old habits and patterns and does not encourage you to take charge of your life.

How about the other side of the coin?

Is your orientation in life mostly focused on “freedom to”? Are you noticing restrictions in your present life and are looking forward, dreaming of a different future? What are you connecting with when you think about “freedom to”? Change your work, travel, learn something new, create more meaningful relationships, have more time to play?

Notice that “freedom to” automatically puts you into a more active state of being: the word “to” needs to connect with an action word! When you contemplate this combination of words, how do you feel in your body? More open, inviting, hopeful? Are you sensing some new possibilities?

Living in a “freedom to” orientation does not guarantee change. It is an invitation to step out of patterns and habits and make choices that are more in alignment with who you are. Your motivation for creating more freedom in your life has to be greater than the resistances that have kept you where you are.

Most people swing back and forth between “freedom from” and “freedom to”. Just as a practice, allow yourself to be aware of where you are at any given time. Being in that present, conscious moment then offers “Freedom” without any attachments to the past or future.

Perhaps we need a new placard: “Free Freedom!”

When I am in that place, I start feeling somewhat empty inside. I become more critical. I eat more chocolate. I feel less energetic and have to push myself to go for a walk. I look for approval. I notice the grass is greener on the other side of the fence (although my tomatoes are holding up pretty well!)

You know what I mean, this place where you just don’t quite feel right, but may not be able to put your finger on what is amiss.

What I have realized for myself is that in that state of being, I have stopped noticing all the miracles, coincidences and beauty that surround me all the time. I am pre-occupied with the past or the future and unable to be in the present moment.

The interesting thing is that the past or future does not nourish you, is not able to fill you up inside. Rather, both of them create a feeling of longing inside – either for more of what you enjoyed in the past or something you wish for in the future.

So, how do you put yourself back in the flow, back into the present moment, back into a place of love and acceptance for yourself and others?

My secret weapon is GRATITUDE!

Look around you and just notice what is amazing in terms of natural beauty, inventions, art, people and pets. The list is endless!! As soon as you notice something that feels like a “wow”, just say: “Thank you!” preferably out loud. The “thank you” is an acknowledgement for having a conscious moment!

The good news is: The more often you say it, the more occasions will present themselves. You are adjusting your inner filter and your senses will start to select more and more “wow” moments out of the endless possibilities surrounding you.

You are in the driver’s seat here. You can actively create continuous opportunities for yourself to be nourished by paying attention to something that is happening in this moment.

Nothing to buy, nothing to create and nothing to manipulate. Just pay attention to this moment now and see what happens!

Does that not bring a smile to your face?